All conflicts can be resolved by peaceful resolutions,’ claimed Nelson Mandela, although it can be difficult to envision this when you’re engaged in an issue in your family that stems from the breakdown of a relationship. It is essential to realize that family bonds are not likely to be totally sever, especially when children are involved.

Mediation can be a great alternative to taking an issue through the courts. Mediation is particularly effective in the reduction of conflict and animosity within families by negotiating the possibility of a compromise.

How does mediation work?

Mediation is a process that is voluntary which you and your ex-partner meet to discuss your issues and determine if a solution can be found. Mediation can start at any point but if you would like to take your case before a judge, generally, you’ll be required to take part in an MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meet) prior to submitting your application. MIAM MIAM is an informational session with a mediator , but it is not mediation in itself. It’s designed to inform the client of their options, and assisting you in making the right decision about how to move forward for you or your household.

A mediator can facilitate discussions among you and the ex-partner. Since they are neutral they will let each of you to voice your opinions and feelings and express your views on what is important to you. If you talk to each other individually, they will help each participant to understand the viewpoint of the other party and assist you in finding an agreement. In many instances, this can help couples to come up with on a solution that is acceptable for both parents and is in line with the needs of children.

What kind of disputes could mediation aid?

Mediation can help in solving a variety of kinds of 家庭纠纷 which otherwise would have the court system like:

dispute over where your children’s children will go to school;
How much hours your child will have with each of you
Unanimity over the way a child is raised like the decision-making about school or extra-curricular activities;
Children’s medical care;
Separation of Finances;
how much time grandparents and extended family members can spend with your children or
arrangements for arrangements for the arrangements for the home of the family.

What are the benefits?

Mediation has many advantages over the courtroom:

Understanding the needs of your family. No one understands the family’s needs more than you do. Finding a compromise means you can create plans that are best suited to the needs of your family and you. Consider the specifics of your week’s routines, like who is going to take the kids to their swimming lessons , or games at the weekends. It is also possible to meet your needs if you, for instance, you have a person who has unpredictable or irregular work time.

A court cannot force the solution onto your family. If you decide to go through court, a judge can decide what happens which effectively imposes a decision on the family and you. This comes with the risk that you are no longer in control of the outcome. It could be better to you as well as your partner to negotiate and agree on issues that you’re at ease with.

Cost-effective. Mediation can bring substantial savings in costs. First of all, you and your former spouse will pay one mediator. This is different from each of you paying for your own independent legal guidance through your own solicitors. In some instances both of you may have barristers involved. The courts also impose charges for bringing requests before them, as well as to seek an appeal. Based on the nature of the dispute, you might be able to skip the court entirely if you come to an agreement through mediation, and thus avoid costs for court, such as by negotiating arrangements with your kids.

Innovative solutions. In most cases, mediating couples possess more resources and understanding of their own situation to devise solutions that a judge will not have time to think of. Mediating couples are able to discuss every possibility that concerns them and arrive at a common understanding on how to deal with each issue. Sometimes, the solutions you come to between you may be different from those the court can order. For instance when you settle a financial dispute you might choose to have one party accept a jointly owned negative equity property, with the understanding that once you sell it, another does not have any financial interest that they may have in that.

Speedier results. Although mediation is a procedure and the time it takes to complete is generally faster than the process of suing court. It also can yield instant outcomes. If you can agree on a matter like the agreements for the children, at the first session of mediation Implementation of the agreement is likely to happen immediately. If you decide to go through the court system, you are likely to be waiting for the court date to make the progress you want.

Keep the lines of communication open. Mediation is an open and transparent process in which the former and you are advised to talk about the issues that you’re facing and tackle the issues head-on. The mediator doesn’t act on behalf of either. In fact court proceedings could be a battle between you. You’ll each receive independent “secret” counsel from your solicitors about what your rights and obligations are. When you go to court, it could be a degree of distrust and suspicion among the former partners, which doesn’t usually occur during mediation.

A decrease in animosity and conflict. This usually leads to peaceful resolutions that are less tense moving forward. There is a sense of openness among couples who mediate that you are likely to not see in a court proceeding. For couples who have children, this can be significant not only in the present, but also in the future, when you will meet again , especially in the context of the lives of your kids.

Results that are not complete. Even if you only deal with a small portion of your problems but you still need to take to court to resolve your remaining issues, mediation may have saved you time and cash.

Does mediation work for everyone?

Mediation isn’t for all. If you’ve experienced violence at the hands of your partner, you’re probably not going to want to be involved in a mediation process alongside them.

Both partners must want to come to a compromise and are willing to openly discuss and agree on compromises. If your partner from the past is not willing, mediation will not be successful.